Back in March 2011 in Love Kills Slowly, Best Love Gives Life I talked about the Ed Hardy tattoo art of Love Kills Slowly that I saw on a woman’s purse. Ed Hardy markets his art for all kinds of apparel and other items, and the Love Kills Slowly theme is by far his most popular. You can get shirts, shoes, hats, swimwear, and even Victoria’s Secret items with this artwork on it.
There are a lot of thoughts on what the slogan really means. For instance, someone suggested that you could say that every time you fall in love you are giving part of your heart, mind, and soul to another person and can never get it back – you die a little when you give a piece of yourself away. Or you could say that when we fall in love, passion burns and consumes us like a fire, slowly converting us into ashes, slowly killing us. Some might say that love taken to extremes carries the negative connotations of the tension and stress that slowly kill us. Or maybe it was just a design for a tattoo. I said previously that I think Good Love can grow into Better Love, which extends and enhances life, not kills slowly. But along with the new poster image above, I’ve been thinking about another significance of this slogan.
It’s also been suggested that the longer you love someone, the more you care about your beloved and the less emphasis there is on yourself. In other words, you become less selfish and less self-centered. The image that that conjures up for me is that the longer I love, the more I die to self and become less self-centered, with more true concern for my beloved.
This fits with the biblical definition of love: It (love) is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. I Cor 13:5. We see that proper love is not self-seeking. If we are loving as we should, we do not put our own happiness above our beloved’s happiness or worse still, injure our beloved in our own striving. I must be willing to make a sacrifice when appropriate and put my beloved’s interests ahead of my own.
For me, to be self-seeking is to be self-centered, and that means to take the other person for granted. We help turn Good Love into Better Love by being grateful for the person we love and fully appreciating them in contrast to taking them for granted. My Black Thanksgiving experience gave me the opportunity to examine myself and choose to die to self more, be more grateful, and appreciate my beloved more. (Since it took me 36 years, I can truly say that love kills (self) slowly.) How about you? Can you think of something to do this week, maybe today, to be less self-centered?